Behold the Magic!

The America is gone

This isn't about me it's about my dad. Sad but honorable. USS America was the greatest aircraft carrier that ever sailed and took down many hearts on May 14, 2005. My dad was aboard America on the very first mission as newly commissioned CV66 in May 1964. This was the very first Med Cruise in the summer of 64 France, Italy, Jamaica, Virgin Islands. I got my future name and he had the time of his life up until 1968. Sad day for the Navy and moreso for me Pappy, but also an adventure of a lifetime.

It's all about a love of nature...

~~~Enchanted One~~~


*All acts of love and truth are my rituals*
*Step right up... and risk everything. Set sail toward your dreams*
*Harm no one. Do what ye will*
*The GODDESS is alive and MAGIC is afoot*
*Here I am! Now what were your other two wishes :o)*

TIMES 3

I really do believe that what a person sends out into the world is what will come back to you. If you are negative and ugly at heart it will manifest itself right onto you and no good fortune will ever shine through. Like attracts like and you have to be the change you want to see in this world. I'm so grateful in my life right now. At this minute I have everything I need to be happy and just to stop and feel it and understand that this is high. Im young and happy and healthy and no worries, nothing is wrong, nothing at all and just enjoying my life and things might fall apart tomorrow but it's all good today. I've always been lucky and felt like there was an angel on my shoulder. No matter what happens I always land soft and take off running and that is because of G&G. So much went wrong but so much went right and I can't even imagine what a mess I would be if it wasn't for them. Last year was so hard and I prayed for a change because I was lost and sad and boom hell house is gone, big wreck in Jan, crazy tailspin ended and suddenly I was me again and the sun was shining and I could slam that door so shut and it was a brand new sparkly day! Not what I meant in my prayers but I definitely got what I asked for. Everything is so good now and I just wish that I could have my personality now and look like I did when I was 20-- Wishful thinking but it's not out of reach at all . All I have to do is just follow through and this total 360 this year made me realize that it's never too late. Im grateful that Im smart enough to know when the sun is shining and life is really good and I know some blue days are ahead but I won't dwell on it. Here and now everything is incredible. I thought that my shiniest day was all over and it hadn't even started yet...and for that Im grateful.

Your own song

What you own is your own kingdom
What you do is your own glory
What you love is your own power
What you live is your own story
In your head is the answer
Let it guide you along
Let your heart be the anchor
And the beat of your own song

Where Beauty Lies

Where Beauty Lies
a mother's poem

Not the whispered wings of butterflies
Nor the golden hues of sweet sunrise
Your lips, your cheeks, your nose, your eyes
This is where true beauty lies

You are what you think about...

*If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude about it. Don't complain.
*Every moment is another chance to turn it all around
*You'll always have time for the things you put first - Anonymous
*Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Being alive is the special occasion.
*Those who dwell live in hell. Build a bridge and get over it. -Unknown
*Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
*Bad times, hard times- this is what people keep saying; but let us live well, and times shall be good. We are the times: Such as are we, such are the times. -St Augustine
*Love is how we feel towards those who show us what is lovable in ourselves -Gerry Spense
*FEAR knocked at the door. FAITH opened the door and there was no one there.
*Success is doing what you want, when you want, where you want, with whom you want, and as much as you want!
*I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me hahaha-- H. Thompson
*The world is wide, and I will not waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum. -Frances Dillard
*Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. -T. Goldberg
*The state of your life is equivalent to the state of your mind
*It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
if your heart's been opened by life's betrayals, or have you become
shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you
can sit in pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it
or fix it. The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer (A Native American Elder)
*Hell begins the day God grants us the vision to see all that we could have done, all that we should have done and all that we would have done...yet did not do. -Giancarlo Meriotti
*In case you should ever sense it's absence, happiness always returns.
Partly because while it's away it misses you even more than you
missed it. -The Universe
*Life always gives us exactly the teacher we need at every moment. This includes every mosquito, every misfortune, every red light, every traffic jam, every obnoxious supervisor, every illness, every loss, every moment of joy or sadness, every addiction, every piece of garbage, every breath. Every moment is the Guru. -Joko Beck

*It is rewarding to find someone you like, but it is essential to like yourself. It's quickening to recognize that someone is a good and decent human being, but it is indespensable to view yourself as acceptable. It is a delight to discover people who are worthy of respect and admiration and love, but it is vital to believe yourself deserving these things. For you cannot live in someone else. You cannot find yourself in someone else. You cannot be given a life by someone else. Of all of the people you will know in a lifetime, you are the only one you will ever leave or lose. To the question of your life, you are the only answer. To the problems of your life you are the only solution. -Coudert

Everything French .. ici j'e t'aimer... Joie d Vivre!

My Hot August Night came today!!

Anybody who knows me knows how I just love Neil Diamond and I came home from work today and here it is from 1972 baby! And the best thing is I love a song called And the grass won't pay no mind and I didn't even know it was on here. It's hot outside and got a ball game later tonight and it's a perfect summer night. This was a great day already and not even done yet!

Missing my grampa today

This is silly but whenever I see a chimpanzee I think of my grampa because his face really looked like one. Not in a goofy way but short, big ears, always a funny expression, and always a good time. Whenever I smell Houbigant musk on someone it just takes me back to when I was a little girl and I miss him so much I can hardly breathe. What I wouldn't give to walk into gramas house and there he is watching Sanford and Son and Mash and the Muppet Show and omaha Wild kingdom. Im so grateful that I had someone in my life growing up who found no fault in me whatsoever. I was the apple of his eye and he never said a mean word to me in my entire life. Times down the road that were dark and unhappy - that is what kept me grounded and clear. I feel sorry for my little sister because she had no one in her life ever look out for her that way, not her dad, no one, and I understand how we can be the same and yet so different. I didn't have to go out and look for acceptance and love from other people by being wild and bad because it was always there. She had to search externally for those things and that explains it all. It's not fair because every girl needs someone in her corner cheering her on and not something that I have taken for granted. My grampa was not a picnic for many years, drinking and brawling and being pretty unbearable to his family. I must have been something that softened his heart because my dad said it all quit when I came along. My mom said I was about 2 months old and he lost his balance on his pontoon and dropped me in the lake. And he jumped in and got me. That's funny. I remember when I was 5 and they took me to Pikes Peak for summer vacation in their big 5th wheeler and we were sitting on this huge boulder in the middle of a stream drinking a&w rootbeer. He was teasing me about cabbages and we picked up these hitch hikers and there were indian posts and shops all over going up the side of the mountain and no rails anywhere. I was so scared that were going move 2 inches over and roll down the mountain.
I can see him telling me about how him and Homer went and shot all those stray cats at Homers Pond. He was grinning from ear to ear and his eyes just sparkled. My grampa was cool if there was one person in this world who never had to grow old and go away just be around forever it would be him. They had some cat named kinky guess he had a kink in his tail- the cat got up on the bar and ate my grampas raisin pie. He kicked that cat through the screen door and killed him and then he went and buried that sonofab.. everything was a son-of-a-b to him and I just have to laugh, my grampa worked heavy machinery and he worked at the dump. All of his friends would come out there and visit him and bring him whiskey so he was drunk every day before he even got home from work. And most of our french familywere bad alcoholics it's in my blood. And through all that he was in church every sunday, father kramer was over for happy hour every single day at 5 oclock, he said his rosary every night and sometimes when I get scared I get his rosary out of my jewelry and sleep with it in my hand.

I think most of all I just feel honored to have meant so much to him. I was my grampas safe place as much as he was mine. I remember when my uncle pat was killed in 1982 and there were secret service agents up on the roof of our school and the church, President Reagan sent an enormous wreath of flowers it was the hugest thing this city had ever seen. And my grampa was sitting there beside that casket and I walked over to him and hugged him and he cried and told me that no one would miss him more than he would. They didn't get along at all and things were just starting to become right and then this happened. And his last day, he was there in icu and I was there with him all alone and he said tell grama how much I love her. She's a good woman and I don't know why she stayed with me all those years. Those words are seared in me and how lucky I was to be there and be the one that he shared that with. And when he died and I kissed him goodbye on the cheek in his casket everybody thought that was weird. They just never understood me. I thank my lucky stars for you grampa and miss you every single day.